HOW TO KNOW YOU HAVE SETTLED FOR LESS IN YOUR LIFE

So, for the record, I am not in any way advocating for people to 'settle'. Almost everyone growing up looked forward for that time where they would 'settle down', preferably with a spouse of their dreams, a house of their dreams, a car of their dreams and wonderful kids.

Inherently, 'settling down' is one of the greatest longings of our lives. To us, settling down depicts maturity. It shows that we are ready to leave our childhood days and start projecting ourselves as adults. I kind of like that kind of a focus.

The Last Time Arsenal Won a trophy...

There is however another kind of settling that is so subtly tied to the one we long for. It is called settling for less!  Unfortunately, it hits most people at their death bed so severely how they settled for less in their lives.

 Stories abound of people who have had NDEs (Near Death Experiences) and they come out totally transformed! You can seldom find an individual who has had an NDE who got worse than they were previously. That is a given! 

Stories also abound from doctors who have witnessed scores of people die under their care. One doctor testifies of two types of people:

1. The Peaceful and Smileful: These are the types that welcome death. It seems as if they have some kind of power greater than death itself. It almost seems as if they are not afraid of death itself. They seem so sure not only of how they have lived, but also where they will live after the bridge of death. They are so at peace. So solemn a peace. If you would get into their heads, they are saying something like, "I am ready"
2. The Terrified and Mortified: These ones know that it is game for them. They show great fear for what is coming, and with the little strength they have left, they will fight death like a man fighting bees. There is great regrets in their eyes. They do not want to go. They do not know what awaits them on the other side. Of course they know there is the other side, their religious persuasions notwithstanding. If you would get into their heads they are saying something like "I wish I knew"

Which group do you think you belong to? If death was to come right now...which group do you think you belong to? Your answer will be determined by the following standards of living. Obviously, if you settled for less than your potential in life, you most definitely will be in camp two. 

But how exactly do you know that you have already settled for less than you deserve in your life?

1. You no longer aspire to achieve goals: Remember that thing about dreaming for a nice house, a cute spouse and lovely kids? The reason as to why you had those dreams is because they can be fulfilled. For the most part, nobody planted those dreams in your head....in fact, some of them came from deep within your soul. Yet you no longer pursue them. You have given up on them. Your greatest focus right now is to put food on the table and clothes on your back. You have settled for less than you were created for!
2. You are comfortable with where you are: It is one thing to give up on goals, it is another thing to be happy about and OK about it. The worst of those who have settled are those who are never bothered to say the least that they could be better. Your greatest desire every single day is for comfort. You have dulled all the wake up calls in your life and even to the extend of compromising your values, you will seek comfort. The opposite of this is what I call a holy discontentment. Just two days back I was asking myself this question, "Lawrence, do you think you have given up or walked away from God's original call in your life?". That question is not comfortable. I do not want to settle!
3. Your speech is full of 'those were the days': You are living in the past. You reminisce your past glory. "During our days, those were the days!" When you speech is punctuated by these kind of statements the whole time you are talking, you have given up on a dream, you have settled. Not that there is something wrong with remembering past glories. I like what Apostle Paul (whom many Atheists hate) says: "Everything in my past that was to my gain, I count it as loss...One thing I do, forgetting those things that lie behind, I press on..." Arsenal as a team should take a cue from Paul the Apostle. You cannot revel in past glories and call that success! That is settling for less!
4.  Your Academic Fires: You cannot remember the last time you self studied. You can only remember when you finished formal school and lit up your 'waste papers of academia' in a mighty fire. You have never taken initiative to read anything constructive about your area of specialization, or your passion. The best you read is news and gossip, especially gossip! You have no mentor, you are reading nothing about any great figure of change in our lifetime, you just stopped taking charge of your mental growth! You have settled.
5. What you hated, you now accept: You would never allow something to be done either to you or to other people. It would most certainly never be congruent with your values. Let me talk for example to newly converted Christians. You remember how you were so 'on fire' you would never watch TV? So how come these days you not only watch lots of TV, but you also have become so comfortable with shows that use nudity and obscenities? If this was not what espoused your values previously, you have settled for less. And no, don't lie to yourself that you have become wiser or more mature....you just settled for less!

So we all know what is going to happen when death comes. You will be fighting it like a man fighting bees...but where will you get that strength from? It will be one of the most painful deaths in the face of the earth. The truth is, anybody without a Life Signature falls in group two mentioned above. Which group are you in?

HOW TO MAKE EVERY DAY THE HIGHLIGHT OF YOUR WEEK

"Nothing will ever dominate your life unless it happens daily" ~ Dr. Mike Murdock

 
"Thank God it's Friday!"...two days later, 'Monday Blues'. Two days later, "When will the weekend come?". Repeat that process for half a life time and you have a wasted life to say the least! Who begun all this madness of looking forward for Fridays and hating Mondays? Honestly!

I tell you what? The reason why people long for Fridays and curse Mondays is that they have left their world (or the world) to dictate their pace. Pure and simple. At the very intention of creation, the purpose for the existence of a human soul was never to play second fiddle to creation.

The human soul is designed to rule, dominate, subdue and make the most of what has been created! That includes largely or centrally, every single minute of the days of our lives! The TGIF (Thank God It's Friday) crew in my submission are a rebellious bunch so subtly that they wouldn't guess! Here are people whose sole mandate is to dominate their environments yet they are so hang up with an escapist attitude looking forward for the weekend. You deserve rest when you have really worked towards your purpose!

It is a sorry day when 84% of the TGIF crew have nothing to show for the whole week in terms of being purposeful, fruitful, dominant and creative yet they are so looking forward for the weekend! It makes you think that the weekends are the most important days in our lives, which is wrong. Every single day is important.

My pastor used to say that the highlight of our week should be a Sunday! Today, I seriously beg to differ. The highlight of every created human being should be every single day of the week! Let me explain. If the highlight of your week is a Saturday, then psychologically, you will look down on a Monday. You might even curse it! What happens then? You become unproductive on that day.

"Building Security has notified us that there have been 6 suspected terrorists working at our office. Four of the six have been apprehended. Bin Sleeping, Bin Loafing, Bin Gossiping, and Bin Surfing have been taken into custody. Security advised us that they could find no one fitting the description of the fifth cell member, Bin Working, in the office. Police are confident that anyone who looks like Bin Working will be very easy to spot. They thought they had apprehended Bin Working sitting at a desk, but it was actually Bin Surfing trying to impersonate Bin Working. Bin Facebooking is still missing" ~CK Japheth

To make every single day the highlight of your week, here are some seven important things that you need to do.

1. Race Against Yourself:This by far is done by very few people. I am yet to find a soul that competes hard against themselves cursing a Monday and blessing a Friday! Find me one and I will show you a phoney! Ask yourself: Generally, what do I want to accomplish? Against what can I measure that accomplishment? How do I cascade it down to each day? How do I track my progress daily? This is what happens when I am racing against myself in any day: I look forward so much to the next activity with enthusiasm. When done and checked, I am a happy man. I do not have to wait for Friday! Every single minute is an opportunity to be happy and productive.
2. Have a daily theme: This helps a lot. If you can name your days, each day is bound to become a highlight. I have had some seasons in my life that I have had to name my weeks. When I am down in week one for example, I name week 2 as recovery and restoration week. Then I schedule my non-negotiables around restoration and recovery.
3. Schedule daily Habits: You see, my action/habit today forms who I will be tomorrow. Today is a seed for tomorrow. So you cannot curse a Monday, can you? That is being daft. You have a chance to every single day schedule purposeful activities that you must do. The TGIF crew know nothing about this. They think that this kind of life is for CEOs and COOs. Well, it actually is. The catch is your focus. If you think you are not a CEO of your own life, you are the living dead. You are also the COO, CMO, and all those titles that matter to yourself! Schedule daily habits.
4. Schedule Fun: "Schedule your pleasure because your pain will schedule itself" ~ Mike Murdock. I couldn't agree more! There is nothing wrong with Facebooking, Whatsapping, Tweeting, Pinteresting, LinkInning, Instagraming and blogging! These things are fun. The only problem is when 90% of employees start their days with Facebooking and checking which player has been poached by which team at how much! If you could have a schedule that you can use to be on social media as well as have fun daily, you will find out that each day becomes a highlight.
5. Review and Reward Yourself: Allocate yourself some marks on every activity that you have checked off successfully. Build a graph of sorts on this one. At the end of the day, you will know what 'Percentage' of intentionality that you achieved. So the following day, you will be able to know if you went up or down on yesterday's values. This is pure self motivation. It makes every day the highlight of your week. The TGIF crew have absolutely no clue how they performed on purpose yesterday, today and tomorrow. But they sure do want a weekend! Each day should be reviewed in terms of what you are accomplishing against what you set to accomplish in the first place.
6. Discipline Yourself: Well, this is a big one. No one will have a highlight if they are not disciplined. With discipline comes tremendous razor-sharp focus! That means you attend to your scheduled activity with all the due focus it deserves, against all distractions. You need to obey your timelines. Do not deviate from them. Do not extend an activity to the next. Live one day at a time. You cannot do 200 push ups in one day...unless you are an athlete. Be faithful to every activity that you have scheduled. Do not play God. I know you can do some multitasking and have two activities done at the same time, eg. driving and listening to something inspirational. Do not over do today, you are not dying in the evening.
7. Put a smile on someone's face: Make it a passion to make someone's day a highlight. This

   

   You can put a smile on someone's face today

   does not need for you to purchase a Benz for them. It is the little things that matter. A phone call, a text, a Facebook Photo...whatever. Just go out of our way to make someone happy today. That will give you a highlight in an instant. It works! Many people want to be happy....they do not know that the shortcut is to make others happy. In fact, subconsciously, I could say that the highest form of our existence as human beings is to matter to somebody else...to be meaningful to them...to impact their lives. It could be a colleague, a family member, a friend, someone younger than yourself, someone older, an employer or an employee. Find a creative way to put a smile on someone's face today. That, my friend, definitely is a highlight of your day!

So there you have it. Next time I hear you saying Thank God It's Friday....you better have a good reason for saying that!

WHEN AFRAID TO ASK...

In my family, we had the first ever bereavement when our first born brother passed on. I was just in my early teenage years. It hurt so bad! He was a great friend and playmate.

When he was ill for the first time, he got admitted to a Mission Hospital back in the village. My mum would be with him full time taking care of him at the hospital. The rest of us would go check on him at set visiting hours.

So there was this fateful day that I had to go see them. It rained so heavily that day. Given that the roads were not tarmacked then, the public transport vehicle I used dropped me about three kilometers from the hospital. I walked that distance. It was around Four in the evening.

I walked straight into the ward where my brother was admitted...lo and behold, he was not there! My mum was also not there! I feared the worst! You see, back then, we did not have cell phones to easily call and locate. I was a young boy barely 14 years of age, and I was thoroughly scared!

So what do you think I did? I walked home in stunned silence...knowing full well the worst had happened. I did not dare talk to the nurses and ask them anything about the whereabouts of my brother. I mean, why would the ward he occupied be empty? 

Honestly, I feared greatly that the nurses would confirm my suspicion. So I walked home and told nobody of my findings. I remained tensed the whole evening. I started waiting...back then, a death would be announced by loud shrieks of mourning women. I waited for those terrifying mourns the whole night, tossing back and forth. I must have dozzed off once or twice...and soon, one of the most difficult nights of my young life ended.

Morning came, and with it my mum. She seemed Ok...she was not alarmed. So everything was fine. I narrated to her my ordeal the past evening. Mother and son exchanged those 'knowing looks'...that story has never been shared with anybody until today...as far as I can remember.

But here is the deal: I could just have as well asked the nurses! Granted, they could have confirmed my fears...they could also have dispelled them. One way or another, I would have faced my worst fears sooner and save myself the emotional turmoil! Why postpone the worst?

Today, I am briefly addressing the fear of asking. A young man is afraid to ask his dream girl out because he is afraid that she will say no. A young salesman is afraid of meeting the Manager because he is afraid that the sale will not be effected. 

A CEO refuses to face the brutal facts about the revenue of his company because he is afraid that news will cause him to make painful changes.

Why on earth do people get scared of asking? I submit it is because they are afraid of exploiting what seems to be their only option available. They think that when they exploit that option AND GET THE DREADED NO, they will be right back on square one.

Square one needs lots of energy to move away from. It always is a place of serious discomfort. No one wants to be there. Therefore, psychologically, we 'mirage' the asking. We put it forward. We kind of hold onto it (the not asking) like our best kept secret. This provides a psychological safe haven of the thought that the option will still be always available to be exploited. It is kind of like an insurance. 

So, we stay in that 'Potential' State yet me move not even an inch. 

When afraid to ask, remember that the best you can do right now is ask

When afraid to ask and you do not ask, you are increasing your chances of defeat

When afraid to ask, acknowledge the fear, but go ahead and ask anyway.

You will save yourselves lots of time, emotions and energy that is otherwise wasted on the 'illusion'.

Makes sense?

SERAH HOPE AMANI

So, what's in a name? Like the name gracing this blog post title today...What's in it? Well, I could say that there is so much in a name. A whole lot that could fill volumes upon volumes of books.

Serah Hope Amani for instance is the newest member of my family. Born on Father's day, June 16th 2013 weighing a whooping 4.2 Kg! This is exactly 3 days after we celebrated the second birthday of her brother, Ethan-Norman! We seem to have perfect timing for the month of June...and the father's day timing was simply a bonus blessing! 

Serah Hope Amani

You look at Serah and you see nothing but newness. You see nothing but promise. You see pure innocence and total dependency. You also see amazing calm and assurance that all is well. I actually nick-named Ethan her brother, 'Mr President' because at that age, anything he said (Cried for) had to be attended to immediately and it mattered less whether the request was granted or not! It just had to be attended to immediately.

Serah Hope represents so much. What this lady can do, time will tell.

• She could very well be Kenya's first woman President that is if it would not have happened by the time she's 35
• She could be the UN secretary General
• She could be a great mother and matriarch,
• She could be a great business lady travelling from one continent to another, generating profits,
• She could be a great compassionate worker, spending her life for the voiceless
• She could be a songstress, out-striping her mother,
• She could be a great radio personality following her parents' footsteps,
• She could be a great wife and mother,
• She could be an awesome youth leader

In other words, there are boundless possibilities for my little bundle of joy. I however do not believe that she could be anything she wants to be. There is nothing of that sort. You cannot be anything you want to be, you can only be all that you potentially can be!

Serah Hope has come already packaged, yet with one blank thing...the mind. In fact there is absolutely nothing I can do as a parent to create a newly packed Serah Hope. 

There are however two possibilities: I could either accentuate her package...or I could slow it down to stagnation. Such is the powerful mandate of parenthood. Parents are not owners! Am sure all the parents of teenagers already know that revelation. Parents are stewards! In other words, we are responsible for the best possible outcome of the life of another human being for more than half their life-time. In fact, we are to some measure, directly responsible to laying down the correct foundation for their Life Signatures!

The Girl Has got cool hair!

According to Rick Warren, the author of Purpose Driven Life, Serah Hope Amani has come to our lives with the following packages in the acronym of S.H.A.P.E.

1. Spiritual Gifts: First off, Serah Hope is an eternal spirit. Selah! She is a pure spiritual being that has been packaged into the physical body that we can see, feel and touch. That is why it beats logic that an atheist for example would not believe in God. Is it any wonder that they would claim they came from a chimp...amazing how a human being can say he was once a chimp (yet we still see chimps), but that stand easily explains away the spirit part of human nature. As a parent, I cannot give her these spiritual gifts. It is God who has packaged her for whatever reason that he has brought her on earth. She will not acquire these gifts as she grows, no she will just discover them with time. My responsibility as a parent is to help her nurture these to the maximum potential.
2. Heart: This speaks of a special passion that God has already placed inside her heart. That explains why I am passionate about Legacies more than I am about saving buffaloes. It's a heart issue. I think one of the greatest adventures of parenthood is to allow great room as possible for Serah to fully wrap her heart around something worthwhile in life. Music? Dancing? Human rights? Child care? Environment? Only God knows.
3. Abilities: These are innate talents. Am so grateful that already Serah has some innate talents! I know she's versatile because on her second day on earth, Serah can already hold the milk bottle by herself! It is another pure adventure to see what abilities God has put inside of Serah. I can't wait for this blessed adventure.
4. Personality: The all critical one! I have never understood myself. As a teenager, I used to be so outgoing, an extreme sanguine. Later on, I just changed. I am cool, calm and collected, shunning publicity at all costs, yet with the kind of passion I have, I need to be before people! Serah has a personality already, quite different from mine, my wife Beth's and her brother Ethan-Norman. Being at peace with that personality is a prerogative of her parents.
5. Experiences: Aha! This is where my stewardship will count. True, her life experiences will be totally different from mine and her grand parents! For example, her grand parents had never driven a car. Her dad owns one. Her dad is Kenyan, Her mum is Ugandan, and shortly, she will be living in West Africa with her dad, mum, and little brother. What Serah will experience is two fold. First, it is all within my control.
   
    The environment I allow Serah to interact with is fully under my control. It should nurture her to the maximum capacity to bring out her life signatures. My Words, the words around the environment we live will shape her life view and her values (That tells you that TV will be shot dead in my house). My actions,  the actions of the people around her will determine what kind of behavior she will pick. I am totally responsible. On the other hand, there are some experiences that will come Serah's way due to the choices that she will make. Either way, these experiences will help shape the person that God wants Serah to be. Non of those experiences will be wasted.

So, as this new life begins, I know that it is a humbling responsibility to nurture this bundle of joy. I remember reading a book long time ago called, "Growing up is a family affair", where the author says that the parents grow together with the children.

Our growth with Serah Hope has begun. This will be definitely a Life Signature!

WHAT IS FATHERHOOD ALL ABOUT ANYWAY?

"When I was a boy of 14, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be 21, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years." --Mark Twain

Father's day is not officially celebrated in Kenya. In Uganda, It is celebrated every 21st June. In the USA, it is celebrated on the third Sunday of every June. That third Sunday makes it most popular as the Father's day world wide.

You have probably heard that Mother's day is more colorful that Father's day. You probably heard of the story about how men in a certain prison sent thousands of Mother's day Cards to their mums, and just a few cards on Father's day. Why is that?

Some years back, while I was leading a mastermind spiritual group, I posed this question to the several men in my meeting: "Who among us does not have serious issues with his father?" Not one person disputed. All of us had serious hangups with our dads.

Fathering is such a powerful thing. Without a father, there is no life. That simple concept should have all #Atheists re-think their philosophy again. I can emphatically say that nothing exists without a father. Creation itself has a Father.

The most crucial aspect of fatherhood however is propagation after your own kind. This means that what I do as a father today is not in any way an isolated incident. Fatherhood speaks of seeds! Fathers not only carry seeds for life, but they also carry seeds for legacy with each day they live and do things. Nothing goes unnoticed in the end!

So really...what is fatherhood all about? Well, after all the action heroes we see in movies for two hour sessions have faded away...what is left off of real examples of fathers?

Well, my take is that Fatherhood is not all that complicated. Why? Well, men (who are mostly fathers) do not have the capacity to handle lots of details at a go. Fatherhood is simple! At the most basic level, fatherhood involves providing, protecting, being a friend, and caring.

It is all about the following:

1. Keeping Your Word: A man, a husband and a father who would keep his word, keep his promise no matter what is a true representation of fatherhood the way it should be. His word is so valued you could take it to the bank. Women are so trusting in nature and they easily take in words that we give them. Children are in fact used as examples for having faith. They trust so readily and so easily. A true father keeps his word to his wife and keeps his word to his children. So what happens if he cannot keep his word? A true father would be devastated. A pretender father would not remember, so he would not feel anything.
2. Staying Power: Fathering is all about commitment. Can your wife count on your support in the long run? Can your children count on you prioritizing them over other things? How long are you available as a father? Men tend to vacillate when things get tight unlike women. A true
   
   father stays and stays and stays and stays. Their loyalty to God and their family is unwavering. A father remains a father in steadfastness at all times and at all seasons. This does not mean that he is not tempted to take an easy way out. However, in spite of the temptation, a true father remains supportive of his wife and children.
3. Nurturing: To be honest, any man can deposit his seed into a woman and a child is formed. Top on the list of what scares pretender fathers is this statement: "I am pregnant!". Some pretender fathers will respond by accusing the lady claiming that "the baby is not mine". Some will sweat bullets and disappear out of her life. Women have been gifted with this wonderful ability to nurture life from conception...till death. I kid you not! I have always wondered how my own mum would call me every time I am in trouble...I wonder how she knows...how she senses it...and I have told this to my wife who marvels all the time at this ability. But here is the thing, a true father will do everything possible to help mothers nurture the children to maturity. In other words, a true father will take care of his seed!
4. Giving Vision: The biggest crisis we have in the world is that of leadership. This is largely because leadership is becoming extinct at the family level. A true father has a personal vision and a family vision! He speaks this vision over his family in their hearing and in their absence. He depends on the Divine to see further than the mother and the children would see. A true father is a master dreamer for his family. I have always told ladies to shun any man who does not have a vision for life. I have always told the ladies to beware of men who are not passionate about anything. Such like living dead men will be overrun with the responsibilities of fatherhood unless something massive in resolve happens to them. Let me repeat: A true father has a vision.
5. Honor: A true father honors his wife...whether she is present or not. Many men (especially pastors) have this knack of 'showing off' their spouses in public. Am not against it. Anybody can do that...in fact, it is generally expected of you to do so. Real honor however is when nobody is watching....and to a good extend, when your wife is not there! How do you honor her? Your character honors her. A person who honors his wife will constantly communicate, prophesy, comfort, teach, and lead. The best way a father can honor his children is to honor their mother! Nothing nurtures a woman more than being honored by the husband...and really knowing for sure that the husband honors her. He will know what she cherishes. He will seek to provide it. He will keep learning and growing and learning and growing in a bid to keep honoring his wife.

Like I said, fatherhood is not complicated. It is a simple calling. Simple things however are not necessarily easy to do.

A happy Father's day to everyone out there! Enjoy!.

RELATIONSHIPS: 7 WAYS TO KNOW YOU ARE IN THE PRESENCE OF A DECEIVER

"Love creates the highest expectations on earth" ~ Dr. Mike Murdock

Lest we forget, there is nothing we can accomplish in the face of the earth without getting all the help we can get. We might need gadgets, we might need time, we might need space, but most importantly we can never do without people, both good and bad. Sometimes, an 'interaction' with an enemy can prove to be more fruitful than with a friend...but I digress.

You have probably heard the saying that "the greatest resource in an organization is people". Well according to Jim Collins, the author of 'Good To great', that statement is wrong!

The greatest resource in any organization is the right people! Relationships are one of the most critical ingredients to anyone's Life Signatures. Unfortunately, I have realized that for the most part, the right people are not readily available.

I am told that one of the richest men in the world, Warren Buffet, takes averagely two years to find an honest leader, yet he has head hunters! But even then, I have had people referred to me by my 'trusted sources' who later on greatly disappointed me. I have ended up in Police cells due to this fact alone. I wholly trusted some people recommended to me without checking. Well, in the spirit of Life Signatures, I could not say that I wasted time, emotions and money...but I learnt greatly!

Sometimes we get hurt by others...before we can realize that they were the wrong people. Sometimes we even get hurt by the right people! Not everybody is perfect. Such is the kind of world we live in.

I have been thinking of late about how we can sift through multitudes of pretenders. There is nothing hurtful like wasting part of your life in the wrong relationship. That being said, it is worth sniffing a pretender from far and save yourself some time and money and emotions. 

Here is how you can know you are in the presence of a deceiver.

1. They do not answer your question as asked: A deceiver always hides the truth. One of the way you will know that someone might be a deceiver is how doggedly they answer your direct question or questions. In fact, the more questions they dodge to answer, the greater the potential of being a deceiver. Check it out in your life and you will find out that this is true. There is nothing like half truths. A lie is black.
2. They hide information: Especially uncomfortable information. A woman falls in love with you and it is mutual. Yet she hides her age. Six months down the line, you discover that her age was never your preference, yet you have gone so deep in the relationship. OK, that is just an example. My point is that before you pursue a relationship further, first you need to know the information you want. Get that information before you proceed. Deceivers hide information. That tells you that if you are deceived, you never had your own information...or you never put out your 'preferences' before proceeding.
3. They rumble on: Well, we have different personality types. So I am not saying that all talkative people are deceivers. However, I have noted that a deceiver's focus is never on yourself. A deceiver's focus is always on themselves. The little word 'I' can appear in their conversation gazillion times before you chip in to speak. A deceiver appears to know everything because her quest is to please you. Here is the thing though: As much as they talk much, they are thoroughly shallow in their speech. You do not feel that they are convicted or connected to what they are saying. Shun them!
4. They invite sympathy: Again, we all do need sympathy at one point in our lives or another. Not everyone that invites sympathy is a deceiver. However, if you can check long and well enough, you might realize that a deceiver gives you wrong information to draw sympathy from you. We are all moved with terrible situations when we spot them to such an extend that we seldom investigate. The anatomy of affairs and poisonous relationships have this bit in their make up. Before you sympathize, investigate!
5. They compel you to make a hurried decision: This is a big one! Have you ever felt being pushed to make a hurried decision? For the most part, whoever is pushing you either really cares about you or they really care about themselves. If there is something at stake for them, you ought to be careful. You ought to again gather more information on them. They could be potential deceivers.
6. They constantly fail to match their words with their actions: This should have been up there as the first one. Relationships are made up of promises and fulfillment of promises. Whoever does not match what they promised with action, always apologizing and coming up with reasons and excuses are potentially deceptive. They care little about you, that is why they do not value their word to you. If this happens twice, red flag!!
7. They mostly say what you want to hear: Master deceivers thrive on a well calculated move to ride on your emotional needs. They know how humans respond to fear. They know how we respond to greed. They know how we respond to hope. So they craftily come in with only what we want to hear! Can I give you an example? You have probably heard this advertisement: "Guinness brings out the power in you!" What a liar! That stuff actually does get power OUT of you!

Well, I rest my case.

Never judge a book by it's cover. Although first impression speaks volumes, I would rather that that first impression is carried through all the time.

I know this will help you, for no man is an island!

MY CONVERSATION WITH AN #ATHEIST (VERY LONG READ)

This is definitely unlike a Life Signatures  post. You realize that most of the things I write here do not have a direct connotation of 'religion'. I have intended to be as all-encompassing as possible. However, over the past several days, I have been wondering about Atheism.

If you want an instant rebuttal on twitter, I challenge you to write anything negative about an #Atheist. Make

Pascal

sure you hash-tag it. That is what I did and I realized that there are multitudes of those who do not believe in the Divine.

• Some #Atheists replied with such un-imagined hatred. I did not expect it.
• Most of them pointed on the wrongs and disasters on earth to declare there is no God
• A good number of them used high sounding words that I needed a dictionary to understand them (maybe they were telling me that #Atheism and theories and lots of knowlege go hand in hand).
• Such a good number told me that there were 3000 'god's to choose from (So what if you choose a wrong one?). I told one of them that God chose me, I did not choose him. I am sure his eyes rolled at 360 mph in the socket!.
• Nearly all off them needed evidence that there is a God before they could believe
• A good number suggested that I was indoctrinated at childhood (well, who wasn't anyway...and that includes Atheists). Yet if anything, I was 'indoctrinated' as an adult.
• Some of course were gracious enough for a 'civilized' conversation

My first post about Atheism went something like this:

"Dear #Atheist. If in the end there is no God, believing Christians have nothing to lose. If  in the end there was a God, you on the other hand have everything to lose".

Almost instantly, more than five #Atheists replied by saying: "Pascal's Wager". That was my very first time to hear that. So I googled it and found an interesting answer here.

Needless to say, I had 'healthy discussions' with some of them till I logged off.

For some reason, I just had this nudging in my mind to send another tweet on the same subject. So as I was thinking about it, I tweeted the following:

"Dear #Atheist. Between #convictions from the Spirit and #Condemnation from man, which one do you experience the most? Be honest".

Well, that tweet is like three days old by the time I write this, but has not received any replies. I should tweet it again.

However, the one that really elicited lots of discussion was this one:

"The No. 1 reason why someone would be an#Atheist is the existence of God. Think about that. Without Him, you have no object of unbelief!"

It is from that tweet that I would like to share the following discussion. First of all, you need to note that there was such a long delay in getting replies from any Atheists. After another day, I thought maybe my tweet was not seen, so I sent it again. 

Again, after some delays, I sure did get some responses as shown:

Me: "The No. 1 reason why someone would be an#Atheist is the existence of God. Think about that. Without Him, you have no object of unbelief!"

Atheist 1: would that make you an aunicornist? @Permission4G @Namale or do you believe in them too? your belief doesn't make your god real cc #atheist (Really did not understand the guy, so I did not reply)

Atheist 1: the reason why i became #atheist@Permission4G @Namale is i woke up one day and realized i couldn't prove my god to myself. neither can you.

Me: @Permission4G And so you keep mentioning 'god'...y would you name something/Someone that does not exist?

At this point, Atheist 2 makes a grand entry into the conversation and takes it away till the end (I must have stopped tweeting)

Atheist 2: @Namale my reason is the lack of evidence for his existence. You believe what you like don't make it true

Me: When you refer to 'him'....you already mentioned his existence...that's my point...otherwise...why say 'he' is not there?

Atheist 2: so when an insane person talks about there imaginary friends that makes them real

Me:  Imaginary 'friend'...if a 'friend' never existed in the first place...would he talk about them? I guess not!!

Atheist 2: yes children have imaginary friends and they don't exist. Saying he doesn't mean they exist.

Me: My point exactly.Where did they get the act of imagining 'friends' if they never knew what a 'friend' is in the 1rst place? 

Atheist 2: by your logic all gods ever invented exist

Me: 'invented' you say? Would something be invented and at the same time not exist?

Atheist 2: they have a friend them they imagined one that doesn't mean that the imaginary one exists

Me:  I still repeat. They are using an 'existing' 'friend' to imagine another one. Can you imagine of 'nothing?' Can you?

Atheist 2: yes invented in peoples head

Me: So they 'exist' in people's heads as you put it. So your job (as an Atheist) is to make sure that they do not exist in your head, right?

Atheist 2:  i'm wondering how people think there imaginary friend it's real with no proof

Me: Can they 'imagine' something that never existed? and if so, how did that non existing entity get a name? Think about that!

Atheist 2: I can imagine a friend don't make them real

Me: Ok...name for me something that exists not...something that you and I know has never existed. Please?

Atheist 2: imagination I can think of anything and name it doesn't mean it is real

Atheist 2:  i'm thinking of a green bob with 6 eyes and calls it's shurpalot. Can you find that because I don't think it exists

Me: Wrong. Let's break it down. You mentioned 'eyes', Check, 'green' check, 'bob', check. It constitutes of what exists.Get it?

Atheist 2: but you said name something I described that one thing not many things that do exist

Me: Your 'naming' was not purely based on what never existed. It is a composition of what you and I know exists already!

Atheist 2: yes that what I named had characteristics that have been given names but as a whole entity does it exist

Me: those are not characteristics. Those are parts of what's existing! Without them, what you just 'created' would not exist!

Atheist 2:  so how does this mean God exists

Me: See, you are now attributing your 'unbelief' to Him. He exists, and He is mean. I think that is your main issue here.

Atheist 2: wow that mean nothing. You think language means God exists

Me: Not really.How did u figure out that the God I am talking about is 'Mean', if u never believed he exists in the 1rst place?

Atheist 2: because I descried something that never existed and you think it does exist but it doesn't i've used language to explain it

Me:  you never described 'nothing'. What you described is made up of what exists, not what has never existed!

Atheist 2: yes I did bit we have language to describe characteristics then you picked it apart to say it exists way I described doesn't

Me: True. Language explains what exists. For example 'internet' never existed, so there was no such name before it. Get it?

Atheist 2: yes but does shurpalot exist? It's got a name

Me:  It's got a name and a description. As of now, its a concept in your mind. Put yourself to work and viola! There it is.

Atheist 2:  so it's a concept not a real thing just like people have with imaginary friends and other have with God

At this point, my mind must have been tired with this draining conversation, so I must have logged off.

So anyway, one of the ways you can have a Life Signature is by having values. Values come from a Higher Power. I do not know where else they would come from. 

That is why my #Faith is in the Almighty God.

I believe He tasked us with the responsibility of nurturing the planet.

I believe He does not intervene in the affairs of our lives save by believing prayer

I believe He loves everybody unconditionally.

I believe His proof of love is to give us choices. Two choices. Accept Him, or reject Him. Love is never forced.

I believe He sent His Son to redeem (buy back) broken and lost humanity.

I believe He is coming back again to take His very own.

To be honest, I have no idea where I would be without Him. I have gone through so much and I have experience so much that you can never dissuade me with any high sounding argument of God not existing.

I talk to Him daily, and He talks back.

My Life Signatures are wholly and strongly held up by his grace.

I am a believer.

How about you?