Wednesday, March 28, 2012

THAT SPLIT SECOND

"I long to accomplish a great and noble task, but it is my chief duty to accomplish humble tasks as though they were great and noble. The world is moved along, not only by the mighty shoves of its heroes, but also by the aggregate of the tiny pushes of each honest worker".  ~Hellen Keller
Life Signatures can be determined...in a split second. The keyword here is DETERMINED. I am a firm believer of incubation and processes, yet even that most important concept in life is preceded by...the SPLIT SECOND. The split second is nothing but the moment of DECISION. In a split second, I can decide to go for the fourth chapati (that means the minimum is three here, hehehehe). In a split second, I can decide to do 'one for the road'. We all know where that normally leads. In a split second, I can decide to go against the grain for the better long run, or maintain the mundane comfortable 'till a later date'.

Friends, we are all faced with that opportunity every single day. It does not take 20 years to decide to live a life of purpose. Neither does it take long to decide to live a wanton and destructive life. It takes a split second. Why is it that way? Simple. We are not robbots, neither are we tamed animals. We are human beings laddend with serious potential. We are meant for success, significance, wealth and greatness. Yet all these things are not a function of copying and pasting. They are a result of conscious choices we make in a life full of split seconds!

When Mike Tyson bit off Evander Holyfield's precious ears, it was a split-second decision. I can almost assure you that it was not a pre-meditated move. Yet, several decades down the line, Iron Mike still is affected by that split-second decision, albeit practising for the bout for months! The decision to have sex before marriage is normally taken in a 'split second'. Yeah, they will tell you that you have thought about it and meditated upon it. That plays a big and major role in the final decision...yet still the real decision is taken in 'split seconds.'

The split second  has a major power in shaping the destiny of a visionary. You know why? Because the split second decision is always gauged between two things: the bright and shiny objects (distractions), and the pale, un-inviting fundamentals that do not guarantee immediate comfort and thrill. I need you to know that in that moment of pressure, in the split-second, you always are in CONTROL. Can I tell you the shortcut for power? It is in a split second, against the lure of the now-now comfort and thrill, standing firm to choose the fundamentals that will ultimately shape a Life Signature. Ngina Otiende says it this way, "Saying 'No' to yourself and others deepens you". There are many happy people in this world, but I can tell you this: The happiest of them all are those who have made the decision that 'deepens' them in a split second!
 
Now, the most interesting thing about the split second is the GRACE available to us to operate AFTER we have made our choice. Whether we choose wisely or not, we have the psychological backing to see us through, just because we CHOSE...and as we do, we also decide the quality of the life that we will have.

In a friendship some years past, I had that opportunity. I had that split second right infront of me. I had a major chance to choose forgiveness right there and then against revenge and pacifying of my anger. I mean, I was justified to complain, front my rights and demand an apology. I also had the opportunity to say, "Forgive them Father, they know not what they are doing". Sadly, I chose the other way. In a split second, the following six months of my life were defined by that tragic decision I made. Tough. Traumatising. Maddening. Infuriating. To cure my anger, I took to running, but I only came back madder! Looking back, I can now see how things would have been different, and much better, if in that split second, I would have chosen otherwise.

I know I have advocated for taking time to PLAN before we execute. It reminds me of an army General who said that plans made before war are mostly useless at war...yet they are still indespensable. The moral is that Life is what happens when we are busy making other plans. The bigger planning is crucial and critical, however, the daily decisions we take are far much more important and impactful.

Friend, we live life in several opportunities of split-second decisions. I know you will take care about that, wont you?

Sunday, March 25, 2012

WHAT THE NAMALES AND THE MANDELAS HAVE IN COMMON



The crowd, the world, and sometimes even the grave, step aside for the man who knows where he’s going, but pushes the aimless drifter aside~~Ancient Roman saying

Make no mistake about it. These are one of the most 'dry' seasons and times of a visionary. When the vision stays just it~a Vision. When the dreams still are up there un-materialized. When a visionary faces situations that are screaming a contrary message of your Life Signature. These are root moments. Yet they are faced the world over. In fact whether one is a visionary or not, they will come to that moment of disillusionment. Those moments where one's efforts seem to go unnoticed. Like one hitting a rock with a rubber hammer-it simply bounces off and even threatens to wreck the wielder of the hammer himself.

These are the moments that form the Steve Jobses, the Abraham Lincolns, the Nelson Mandelas and the Lawrence Namales, and for a good measure, you can insert here your clan's name. To be honest, I have learnt to embrace these moments and if anything, MAXIMIZE them. You see, the earlier I accept the root time, the earlier it is that I start filling up my Life Signatures with incredible nutrients. In fact the best University out there has been called the UNIVERSITY OF LIFE. It is in this place that you learn stuff first hand. There is no one to dictate notes, no one to mark your assignments. The root moments. We oughtta cherish them.
Isn't it amazing that our greatest opportunities so often arise from our greatest challenges? Yet we find it paradoxical enough that sometimes we term these moments as 'the lost years of our lives'. We could never be any wrong on a definition. These are seldom lost years. These are root years. Root years tend to pose those pertinent questions to a soul and ultimately to a Visionary of Life Signatures. Where we go wrong for the most part is equating progress with motion, or fruitfulness with incessant action.

However, one of the largest ingredients of success to a visionary is those solitude, rocky, tough times that life itself does not make sense at all. When your dream seams like a mockery to you. When pursuit of a dream is threatened with the watering down of a life to mundane living of putting food on the table, cloths on your back and shelter on your head. Evidently, this is far from fun as we know it. However, it is such times that shape our character, mold our resolves and strengthen our belief in the dream. Remember the iDIMENSION?

The crux of this post is to encourage all of us to stand focused on the path of our Life Signatures at those seemingly 'God forsaken' moments. What I have seen many people do is 'wait out the season'. This means that they suspend living and ultimately drop the dream...until such a time that conditions will become favorable. That is a mistake. I have learnt that there are illusion in tough times. The first illusion is that...the times are tough all over the place. Why do I call it an illusion? It is because everything else around us is sifted through the glass of what we are experiencing.

I have learnt to embrace and welcome the root-times of my life, knowing full well that they are shifting shadows. Will be here today, tomorrow they will be forgotten like they never existed. Of course the root times vary depending on the dream and the person. For a certain Mr. Nelson Mandela, it was well over 25 years of root time. We are talking a quarter of a century of root time just for one man alone. But in the end, this is one of the most respected statesmen who ever lived, I dare say in the same league as Abraham Lincholn and Martin Luther King Jnr.
For a certain Steve jobs, it was half a lifetime of starting over. One amazing thing is that the man just kept working. Kept believing. It made no difference whether it was a root time or otherwise. It is no wonder that some of the products at Apple are out of stock months after introduction for the very first time in the market.

Friend, root times do not make any sense....and that is perfectly well. They are not supposed to make sense, at least to a normal human being. They are to be embraced. Vision is to be held despite the things happening around that we do not understand. I read somewhere that 'persistance is the mother of personal development'.  I could not agree more.I count myself persistent, and how lucky and blessed I am to have many examples of individuals who have already gone before us, no doubt leaving their Life Signatures not only to this generation, but many more to come.

Wednesday, March 21, 2012

iDIMENSION

Forget about the latest technology in TV and games. Forget about 3-D, and HD, there is a new kid in town...but wait. This kid has always been around. A wise man said, there is nothing new under the sun. Very true.With latest advances in technology, sometimes our undoing is ignoring the fundamental and rushing after the spectacular and the 'on vogue'.

There is something extremely critical in Life Signatures. You see, Life in itself is so vast that not even the latest technology can give you an all-rounded view of the nitty gritty details. Someone developed a concept called 'the butterfly effect' which says that the flapping of a butterfly's wings some place in Japan affects the weather patterns in America. I agree. Yet even that powerful phenomenon is nothing compared to the iDimension. Let's face it, Life Signatures for the MOST part depends on a human being 'showing up', and the iDimension 'closing up' to bring the puzzle full-circle.

Before we can talk about the iDimension, let us talk about 'Control'...For some reason, safety in life is derived from the ability to control most things around us. We tend to want to have a grip on everything. Life Coaches will tell you to get a grip on every area of your life...Mental, Physical, Social, Financial, Business and Lifestyle. I have come to learn however that you can never have control over stuff as much as its conception, existence it and success is not fully dependant upon you. Think about it this way...if I had full control of my finances (especially the income)...will I need to set financial goals? Why Am I setting them goals in the first place? Simple. I have no FULL DIMENSIONAL VIEW of the HOW...and sometimes the WHEN. All I know at the moment is the WHAT and the WHY!

Friend, the biggest reason as to why people do not design their Life Signatures is that small aspect of Control. Most people having know that they have no control over something, would rather leave it alone.  That my friend, is sometimes one of our greatest undoing-failing to do our part. Just because we do not understand the full view of how things will work out does not mean we should shun it. You have heard that old advice in Investments: "Do not invest in what you do not understand." Well that goes a long way. However in terms of Life Signatures, I would say this: "Do your part and TRUST the rest to the iDimension".

I am learning that the ultimate way to Life Signatures is to Surrender. Let the nitty gritty sort itself out. In fact, the key word here is TRUST. Ever seen a control freak? They are a total mess! They are less creative, and if anything, they stiffle creativity and growth for that matter. The ever wanting to be totally involved in everything, to be well acquainted with all the processes is to say the least the worst thing in pursuit of Life Signatures.

So what is the iDimension? Glad you asked...more glad that you have read this far! This is the most powerful aspect of our Life on Earth that is close to the divine. Why? Simple..the divine set it up in the first place! It might not be the divine itself...but it borders the infinite. The iDimension is not a substitute of the Divine, but a powerful collaborator between the finite and the Infinite.

The iDimension is the deeper and bigger portion of the iceberg that is not seen with the naked eye. The iDimension refers to the Invisible, Infinite possibilities, always available to those who will do their part and trust the iDimension (process) to finish its work. It never goes wrong. It always will work with what has been offered. The iDimension is that which you and I have no grip on. It is the invisible mechanics that materializes our dreams and desires.When a soul sets out to do something, it this the iDimension-that part that sees and knows and controls the unseen in terms of people, events, locations, connections of dots et all that ultimately materializes the desire.

When a seed is sown, it is the iDimension that takes over behind the scenes to bring that seed to germination. The tendency to want to know WHAT the iDimension is doing and HOW it is doing it is what causes many dreams to be aborted. It causes many seeds to be dug out of the ground. Here is one of the most uncomfortable thing about the iDimension: TIME. It takes time to gestate. It takes time to mature. It takes time to germinate and to grow.

Know this however, that if the sower does not sow, there is nothing the iDimension can work with. It is a collaborator, remember.  Ever heard this statement, "I have no idea what happened." Well, it is because by nature we have no access to the full mechanics of processes. My challenge today: Do your part, let the process have something to work with. Trust the process to bring the desires. Patience and trust are key. Have an iDimensional day, wont you?

Thursday, March 15, 2012

REBELLIOUS SUCCESS

"The greatest contributors in life are those who though afraid at the knock at the door, still answer it"~Dr. Stephen Covey
If you googled the word 'Success', you will come up with millions of references. If you googled up the word Rebellion, you will come up with less millions of references. Yet, to be honest with you, those two words are not by any means oxymorons. An oxymoron is basically two sets of words that should not go together. Examples include Child Soldier,  a Fine Mess, a Little Pregnant, Accurate rumours, Act Naturally, Almost Pregnant. Here is the one I have been caught using most of the time I speak: Living Dead.

I have already talked about a previous assignment that I was part of somewhere on this blog. What I did not share were the intricacies of my rebellion then. To sample just a few, my predecessor used to leave office at 12: 00 p.m on occassions, go back on Sunday to finish on some reports. Yours truly would be out of the door shortly after the official 5:00 p.m. Not that I hated the job, just that there is life outside the job...like you know theatre, recreation and even relaxation and rest for the next day. Now, if you like pleasing your bosses, my move was suicidal. It did not take long before I would be labelled 'lazy', 'non committed' and a guy who 'just likes sleeping and playing guitar' (I used to on occassions go to work with my guitar since I had use of it AFTER work).

Guess what was the wisest thing to do? Get rid of me. Yeah. And guess what was the simplest method of showing me the door? Give me responsibilities that will make sure that I leave office at 12:00 P.M, and be back on Sundays. If you are smart enough, you would know that the reward for my predecessor was, well, my responsibilities. Not even a raise, or a bonus. Just a shift in JDs! Cruel, isnt it?
"The 'why' of doing something can be a very great motivational force". I read that somewhere. Ever asked 'why are we doing this?' and you get that answer, "Because I said so?" Not so good for motivation. I have come to learn over the years that there is no one method of success. Just because that great preacher called Smith Wiggolsworth used to dance around his bed and jump on it before sleeping it does not mean that if i do the same RITUAL...I would get the same results! Success is going totally against the grain. Not wantonly however. It is going against in order to align with what resonates within. The recipe for failure said Bill Cosby, is trying to please everybody.

The recipe for success is defining your own terms of success, drawing your own line in the sand, raising your own stakes, and ultimately competing against yourself FIRST. This way, you are doing things not because somebody somewhere said so, but more importantly because YOU KNOW WHY. We fail miserably because we fall in the trap of RITUALS and STEREOTYPES. We are not courageous enough to succeed at our own terms. Now this is not an excuse for us to set mediocre goals and coast around life leisurely. This is rather a call to reach out with our bare hands and get a firm grip on our God-given YouNique potential and run our own race, fighting our own fight to the very top. 

Think about it this way. You are breathing in and out. You are alive. You are healthy (I hope you are), and you are here. For what purpose??? My existence is not for the purpose of breathing in and out and putting away some meals in a 12 hour period, only to repeat that cycle until I expire!!! There has gotta be a bigger reason to life than survival...I feel it deep within my gut! A friend a mine who just graduated from the University told me that her next plan is to find ANY job...and that if she can JUST pay rent and get fare to work...and SURVIVE...that will be OK. Now, you have to note that this is not only tragic, but it is also a stereotype. Many people wish for affluence, but many of them plan for survival. It is time to go against the grain, and stand up like a pink elephant and make a difference! If not...why dont we all just stop breathing in and out?

Yes, some success principles are universal. However, not all achievements that can be termed success are universal. The only way to be successful is to be rebellious! This will ensure that as you reconnect with what is RELEVANT to you as far as success is concerned.

I must tell you that the ploy to kick me out by making me leave work at 12:00 p.m did not work. It is kind of like the proverbial story of using the bricks they throw at you to build a wall. Like I had mentioned, I was 'rebellious'. It took me two days to understand the reason as to why this guy was perceived more hardworking, worthy of a present of a changed Job Description-he was inefficient. The next thing I did was to totally go against the grain. I wrote to the client (SUICIDAL), and told them that I would change the way reporting and collection of data was done. They said they would wait for the changes and decide. It is years down the line, they have not 'decided' yet, but I can tell you this, I was still leaving work at 5:00 p.m, and my predecessor was still faithful, no pun intended!

Why sit there and accept 'the normal' even if it is not working for you. Why should I be 'OK' just because 'at least I am surviving?' Look, I know most of my words here are theoretical, but it is my hope that he UNCTION and the SPIRIT of this post is conveyed to us clearly: STOP ACCEPTING THE PROGRAMMED, REACH WITHIN AND UNLEASH...yourself.

Monday, March 12, 2012

'LAWRENCE IS BLIND IN THE HEAD'

"Feedback is Breakfast for Champions"~Quote
 
Tests, tests, tests! So negative attitudes to tests are that whenever I hear that word...especially if I am unprepared I cringe. I do not know about you. May the person who loves tests raise their hands up? Did I see a hand? Only cheeky boys would, and I was always one of them. You see, Ladies and Gentlemen, someone said that a life not examined is not worth living! I agree.

Let me ask you a question: When is the last time you had some kind of test? Ever attended a HIV screening in full knowledge of your 'unpreparedness'? Scary, right? Very. Yet it is better that we are tested to know our status. Tests give results. Results when KNOWN and ACCEPTED provide a better dimension of life to take. You see, "it is better to work hard in the light, the full light of WHO we are, than to work hard groping in the dark!"  
I heard this line as I was watching 'Hell's Gates and Heaven's Flames', "if you sleep around, your wife might not know...after all, what your wife does not know cannot hurt her"! Hmmm. Sounds very philosophical...yet the problem is ...YOU WILL KNOW. Most people do not want to know...ok, maybe they do but are not sure how comfortable the knowing will be. So they keep in the 'secluded safe middle', that assures them of safety from not knowing. It's called fear. Fear of the truth...fear of failure. Let me let you in on a little secret. What you are afraid of...normally, eventually...happens. What to do? Face it squarely...as EARLY as possible.

I have always said this and I will say it again: My greatest revivals in life have come through miserable failure. Some motivational guy has even said that failure is the ingredrient of success! I agree. And If you agree with me, you will know that it is vital for Life Signatures that you are examined again and again. The most beautiful examination is the one you give yourself...but that is for another discussion on another occassion.

Close to a year back, a former colleague suddenly passed on. Left behind a young wife and two beautiful kids who were barely ten. Post mortem: He had a blood clot in the head. Reason: He hit his head on a wall some time back..recovered and forgot about it. Verdict: If he had done routine medical check ups, that clot would have been detected. Blame the devil? Well...better yet, let us not play blame games here, they are too late to salvage anything. 

My own kid bro years back was diagonised with Chronic Kidney failure. Chronic in medical terms means that it took time IN THE BACKGROUND to develop. Ladies and gentlemen, that is critical for Life Signatures. Do you know what is taking place in the background of your life right now? Do you have any Idea on what is silently rotting away your potential? Honestly...do you? Just how would you know if you did not get...well...tested? Fortunately, there are signs daily that show us that something is amiss. They indicate the silent epidemic that rusts out our Life Purpose, our Mission and Values in life, chocking the very potential we were created with. Key of them is unhappiness. Others include: an unfulfilled life; Inferiority; Lack of passion; Endless watching of Jack Baeur on TV 'to kill time'; Inconsistencies; Many starts no finishes; Stagnation; Being Fearful; Lack of Vision/Mission Statement; Lack of budgets; Lack of Dreaming; Gossiping; Slandering; Dishonest gain; Working like an elephant while eating like an ant; Over eating to reduce stress; Stress; The blame game...let's blame the government...the boss...wife..kids...the police...let's blame everyone and anyone save one person...thyself. These and more are signs that sometheing is wrong somewhere in the roots.

Anyway, I was not gonna talk about those today. I just needed to focus on one thing here. Sometimes when we take tests, we have a pre-concieved Idea on what our results should be. I have just taken one test today that gauges my THINKING and DECISION MAKING PATTERNS. According to Jay Niblic in 'What's Your Genius' there are three kinds of decicion making levels:
  • The Head: Strategic and Structural Thinking. The world is a problem to be understood and not solved. (I really loved this one...and as I took the test I honestly DESIRED and hoped that I would have this natural talent.
  • The Hand: Looks at things from practical, real-world, result oriented perspective. The world is an objective waiting to be achieved. (I love this one too, but not as much as the first one)
  • The Heart: Looks at a situation from a humanistic, personal perspective. (I personally cannot function without this. I am the Hearts guy. So I KNEW that I would test POSITIVE on this one)

All of us have Masters and Blind Spots to all the three natural thinking and decision-making talents. Some people have Masters in ALL of those three dimensions (I Personally craved to be one of them!) Let me explain something. The blind spots do not indicate incapability in that natural talent. They simply indicate that that area is less developed. They also say that when push comes to shove, we would most probably struggle in operating the functions that are dependant on our blind spots.

So I was eternally shocked, (like a long lost friend of mine AnneMarie Kakyo normally says: Shock on your eternal soul!) to find out that well, I AM BLIND IN THE HEAD. OK now would you stop that laughter? It does not mean that I am dumb...but heck even if I were, I am still convinced I have a Life Signature. (Mental note here: Need to do a post titled, 'The Correct Way to Say I am DUMB'). Being blind in the head just means that when it comes to big picture thinking, strategic planning and all, I would do those functions CONSCIOUSLY. Meaning that I would not depend on my genius or natural talent.

So what to do? Grieve that I am not Balanced? Well...how is that gonna help anybody. I have learnt to celebrate and focus more on what I HAVE rather than cry over what I DO NOT HAVE. Somebody said, "Quit fixing what God left out and instead work with what God put in". One thing is for sure though: There is NO ONE...Nobody on earth that lacks all the three natural thinkig talents. Nobody. Especially you who is reading today. Just know this. You are not perfect, but even in your imperfection, if you could FOCUS sharply on your MASTERS, soon enough, you will be building a Legacy for years to come.

What tests have you taken of late? What tests are you taking periodically? What is your average score? Are you on course? How would you know without a test? Over to you. Love them tests.

Oh by the way, Lawrence is HIV- (Negative). "Well how do you know that"? You may ask. Simple, I got  tested, and now I know!

PS:
This is one of those blog posts that is not entirely my brain child. Enough credit goes to Jay Niblic, Author of 'What's Your Genius'. I am privileged to feature him here since his work is extremely relevant to Life Signatures. Check out his website: http://whatsyourgenius.com

Tuesday, March 6, 2012

THE CORRECT WAY TO SAY 'I HAVE NO JOB'

Let me ask you a question. What is the single most important thing in our present age that defines the worth of a human being? Think about it for a minute. Every time two acquaintances meet, after the usual small talk of 'What's up? How are you?', there normally arises that single most terrorizing question: "So what do you DO?". I have seen people so accustomed to this question that they normally start rumbling about its answer sometimes even before the question is popped. 

I have seen the light in people's eyes diminish immediately that subject is brought up. Others of course will look aside, ashamed to hold their friend's gaze who are waiting for an answer. I am thinking, sometimes "Would you marry me?", is less dramatic than, "So, what do you do?" In this day and age, our worth is gauged by how fast, eloquent and excited we can answer that question. Never mind those who fake it, they have already been influenced by how society's stereotype.

That being said, there are millions upon millions of woes all over the world. Those woes are faced not just once, but several times in someone's day, let alone a week. The woe is this very thing, the statement: "I have no job". Woe to you if you are to be married and you have no job. Your chances are slimmer than a cartoon that has been flattened by a train. Woe to you if you needed to be relevant in society and you have no job! Woe to you if you needed to have some 'Class'...and yet you are jobless. Woe to you if you wanted to make plans for a big life of affluence and yet you have no job! (Can you imagine the irony here?)

But wait a minute. Who gives me the powers right here to proclaim woes? Can you imagine the nerve? A man sitting somewhere in cyberspace dishing out pessimism faster than a food-processing plant. Well, if your fingers are pointed at me...I have you right where I wanted. The person to blame is not me, it is society. It is our society that expects us to excel by primarily having or acquiring a job. It is the self same society that would consider someone worthless just because 'they have no job'.

We have the whole thing backward! Instead of concentrating on WHO people are, we are more fascinated by WHAT they do! Think about this for a minute. The most impactful people around us are those who have FIRST of all understood WHO they are. Their WHO most definitely defines the extent of WHAT they can achieve! Wouldn't it be nice to replace that terrorizing question with a much better one? How about two guys meet, the normal small talk goes on and then we come to this part: "So, WHO are you man?" Ah! What a question! What a life defining question! Now wait a minute. There is still a wrong answer to that question...and guess what? It comes from the stereotype we talked about few moments back. I have seen that wrong answer time and time again especially when interviewing people for a job. "Who are you"? I ask. "Well, I went to blah blah blah University and I have a Degree in blah blah blah". (Read the Correct Way to say, "I have no Degree")

Would you shut up already! I asked you WHO you are, not what you have done! Can you answer that question faster than a Ferrari, more eloquent than Dr. Martin Luther King himself, and with much unction and conviction than TD Jakes posses when he's in the zone? If you can, I will tell you the right way to say you have no job. You ready? This is what you should say: "I am an SEO". A who? You asked. You are a Self Executive Officer! Makes no difference whom you work for or wish to work for or are not working for! Who said your worth is measured by how many hours you are able to trade your life for a paycheck?  Listen, we were all born for Life Signatures. To live to leave a Legacy and not to be forgotten soon after we 'expire'. Can a job give you a Life Signature? Well that depends on the correct way to say 'I have no Job'.

Sample this: It is a full-time job being a Self Executive Officer. An SEO is someone who knows exactly who they are. This alone takes half a life-time to find out (without relevant coaching that is). The real woe here is countless millions out there who 'have jobs' yet are as clueless as a cow on a new gate on WHO they are! Soon enough, the job is gone...kaput! Just like all jobs do. The real assessment of the story is: Do they have the job...or does the job have them? Nothing wrong with jobs. In fact, I take issue every time I have an opportunity to speak, with some 'Life Coaches and Speakers' out there who have read few lines of Kiyosaki going on crusading that jobs are useless, and we should all quit and move the the fourth quadrant! The next shut up is for such like people. Would you please shut up already!

I have always known that jobs are serious launching pads for people's destiny...if they endeavor to remain SEOs. SEOs without jobs are on the verge of a major break in their lives. Living as an SEOSEO and never resign from this post. The day you do, that is when 'you will have no job'.

So after winning the battle of a lifetime defining your WHO, the most important thing is to Accepting your WHO and distancing yourself from the stereotype in Society. That stereotype of branding who you are by what you do. It is at this level that some people become increasingly frustrated by WHAT they are doing. I have heard people with plum jobs saying, "Man, I am better than this....there has gotta be something much better I can do in life than this"! Holy Discontentment. My friend Bake calls it 'Divine Disobedience'. Selah!

Finally, the last leg as an SEO is to create yourself. This is where an Author called Jay Niblic has said that instead of changing YOURSELF to fit in a job (ever taken Engineering and ended up being a cook?), you CHANGE YOUR ROLE accordingly to fit to WHO you are. Are you jobless out there? Take  up your own vacancy and become an SEO. "How is that going to provide for food on my table and status in society"? You may ask. That is the million Dollar question. Instead of just putting food on the table and clothes on your back and a ring on your gal's finger...your reach will increase tremendously to cover the whole world.

Let me ask again: WHO ARE YOU?

PS: The latter part of this post was influenced much by Jay Niblic's book 'What's your Genius?' The SPIRIT and UNCTION behind the post is something I have always had for years on end...so you can imagine how ravenous I am devouring Niblic's Book. You are a Genius...your were born one, now you need to die one.

Friday, March 2, 2012

ABOUT THE BUSHES AND STORIES OF 'NO MAN'S LAND'

A certain Comedian being interviewed quipped, 'At the height of my career, I was invited by the Bush family to go make a presentation. So when my time came, I stood before the bushes....I mean the Bushes and made my performance'. Smart people will read between the lines and get the joke...others, well do not take life too seriously. Reminds me of a quote that Coach Phillip brought to my attention the other day, "On your way to making a million, stop by and pick up a rose"~Jim Rohn.

It happens a lot. Even with this post. People want to get to the subject matter immediately. So it does not help me much when I have a title like the one above...that basically hides the message. Such like a way of writing pleases readers but not prospective clients. This message has further been fueled by another post by a friend of mine Robert Bake, the founder and President at Authors' Forum-Kampala.

Lingering is not such a good thing. When you are crossing a border between two countries, there is normally a small piece of land in between the two called 'No Man's Land'. Here, there is no government, no legislation. If you pitched a tent there, you will belong to no country. You will have no identity.

That analogy is pretty extreme, yet this scenario pervades our lives daily. We for some reason, love circling the airport for long before finally landing. We like beating about the bushes instead of going to the real deal. It is much like what we talked of in the previous post. We never like being real-especially with other people. We love  putting the best foot forward so we can impress. There is a time and place for that.

I remember several months ago, there were two parties that needed to get into a business agreement. The financier was more concerned with the safety and guarantee of their cash. The business people were more concerned with earning the trust of the financier. You should have seen the back and forth, back and forth between the two parties. It was like watching a pretty s.l.o.w tennis match. Much as the business people did all they could to please the financier, nothing was shifting...well until I spoke up. I told the financier the bare truth. The truth that there is a possibility that the project would not work, and that her finances would be in jeopardy. When the business people agreed with me, you should have been there to see the peace in this financier's face. That is all she needed. When these guys said what they were afraid of saying, that settled the matter right there and she was on board!

Fear of losing is always there. The earlier it is tackled head on the better. Much like the quote I saw the other day, "Face your fears instead of Face Booking them!" Quite true. You see, staying in no man's land has this illusion that you are safe....and that is exactly it! It's an illusion. There is no safety in no-man's land. There is no safety in lingering for long instead of doing the uncomfortable right on (Sounds poetic). Yes, you might lose the client if you told the bare truth...but the trust you will get from your action will be far much valuable than getting a client who will mistrust you later

The reason as to why psychologically many people love the No man's land is that there is no paying taxes over there! Well, neither are there paved roads and utilities delivered!

The same applies with decision-making. I heard an elderly gentleman working for the UN some weeks back say these words, "At the UN, we are encouraged to make decisions IMMEDIATELY, and not to sleep over them". How so true. Being undecided for long is weary. Living a life of legacy needs focus and concentration, things which cannot be achieved if you are living in' no man's land'. My admonition to everyone is to gauge your life at the moment. Like that nice Sunday school song, let me ask: "Whose side are you yelling on"? What are you focusing on for your life really? What 'country' do you belong to? Could it be possible that you are in 'No Man's Land' at the moment?

That is the end of my message. I just need to qualify it with some stories here and there now. I remember few years back I had to make a decision about a relationship. We had taken a very long time living in a 'separated' state ostensibly to sort our options. That was OK, since the decision had already been taken to 'separate'. So we were not in No Man's land per se. However, when the said time came to take sides and agree on one decision, the other party still wanted more time. I guess their mind was already leaning on one side, a side that they knew I dreaded much. To be honest, I really did dread the decision not going my way. But let me say this, the greater dread was waiting another season of time to decide. I could not wait any longer. The waiting state has the capacity of literally crippling you. It has the capacity of taking the life out of you. Sometimes it presents the 'false hope' that the longer you wait, the more probable it is to take a more favorable decision. So when we insisted on taking this decision, well, as you would have imagined, it went flat out against me. I have never cried so much...even lost weight in a record two days! But guess what? I was as free as a bird. I was at least with a standing...and that ultimately gives you direction on the next steps. That was a biggie I tell you.

Another story I am reminded of is the day I took a flight from Nairobi to Entebbe. I used a small plane, the kind of which cant fly 37,000 ft above the ground. In essence, I saw the whole land mass all the way from Nairobi...and a large water body as we entered Uganda's airspace. That was the fun part, until we approached Entebbe and the Pilot informed us that he will be circling the airport for some time until something was sorted on the ground before landing. So there we were suspended in the air, going round in circles. Not fun at all. When we finally did land that is when relief hit me. It is amazing to know that very many people's lives are suspended out there in this and that. They know what exactly they need to do...but have not made the DECISION to.

I have been there. When my wife (then 'just a good friend') introduced me to her mentors, the lady told her later on that I am a slow decision maker. According to Beth, her mentor told her that I would finally become her husband, but I am a slow decision maker. It was very true. For some reason, I wanted all the details to fit.I wanted to know the big picture as well as the nitty gritty of the details before making a decision. I have learnt since that it is wise to move on at the earliest opportunity, and manage the consequences of my decision. After all, you can never regret about a decision, you can only LEARN from it and ADJUST.

In Kenya, few years back, the country was plunged into chaos. Reason? Two men were claiming to have won the presidential elections. When finally the two parties were brought together on a table, and a compromising DECISION taken, the dust settled. Here is the deal, you will always have the good of both sides of your decision. The problem is, you can never have them both. Staying in the suspended state gives you the POTENTIAL of both good, but does not give any one of them to you.

My take on life is this: First, we need to ACT SOONER than later  on our decisions. Second, we need to reduce the amount of time taken living in no man's land. Thirdly, you might never be very sure of a decision. If you were wrong, just learn from it and move on. Lastly, it never pays playing safe.

Have a bush-free day, wont you?

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